This week has been an off week for me. I’ve been in a funk and my eating has been all over the place. A lot of things have been on my mind and with everything going on regarding the current health pandemic, it is just a lot to handle and right now I am struggling. This week the world lost a sweet, kind lady who was a client that I worked with at my previous job. She was a very special lady who I enjoyed working with and really touched my heart. Despite her physical challenges, she always had a smile on her face and was kind to everyone that she met. When I heard the news yesterday that she had passed away from covid at the age of 58, my heart just broke into a million pieces. I have so many negative feelings regarding what has happened with this pandemic and the governor of our state who has refused to issue a mask mandate. I am so angry at the people who still refuse to wear a mask and continue to perpetuate false information on social media claiming that it’s not that bad, it’s not that deadly, and that masks don’t help. I am so tired of hearing people complaining about their “rights” being infringed upon because it is inconvenient and uncomfortable for them to wear a mask. I’m tired of hearing people arguing over and over with public health departments and schools because they don’t agree with their policies. I’m tired of all of the sad news day after day. Hospitalizations in my state are at an all time high and it’s just going to get worse once flu and cold season get underway. Yesterday in my state thirty-one people died from covid. One of them was my friend who will never get to see her grandchildren grow up. Her son and daughter will never get to hug their mother again. My heart breaks for them and my heart breaks for everyone that is experiencing loss and sickness during this time. It just exhausting and I am so tired.
I decided that I needed a fresh start, so I went into my WW account and deleted all of my previous weigh ins and I’m starting over. I have been struggling so much over the past year or so and I feel like giving myself a new start might help to motivate me to work harder toward my weight loss goals. I had lost over 50lbs and then gained some of it back, and being able to see that in my WW app was discouraging and messing with my head. So I am focusing on what I’m doing now and moving forward.
This weekend has been a blessing because my parents wanted to have my kids for the weekend, my husband is in the field, so I’ve had some time this weekend to myself. It has been nice because I have been able to have some quiet time as well as time to clean and get groceries so that I can set myself up for success this week. I have all of my meals planned out, I just need to track them in my app and then I will be ready for the week. I’m feeling really optimistic about this week and I’m hopeful that it is going to be a great week!
This week I have been struggling a bit and I am fighting to get back in control of my eating. I started the week out okay but I’ve been giving into a lot of temptations and cravings and I haven’t been tracking like I should. It is a stressful time of year for me and with that I usually end up comforting myself with food and it’s a cycle that I need to stop. It’s harvest time so my husband is working in the field and so we don’t see much of him. Dealing with the kids 24/7 on my own is very overwhelming for me. I get no breaks and no time to myself except for when they are in bed. So that seems to be the time where I am wanting to snack late at night.
My sister is hopefully going to come over on Saturday so hopefully I can get a little time to get to the store. That seems to be the only time I ever get to myself. But thankfully harvest started early this year since we have had no rain, so hopefully it will only be another month or so before it’s done. In the meantime I just need to work on getting my mindset back in the right place and focus on my goals. It’s so easy to get distracted and lose that momentum so I have to do everything I can to manage my stress in a better way.
It’s already the end of September and I feel bad because haven’t lost much weight at all this year. I am hoping to lose at least 15-20 lbs by the end of the year so that I can start 2021 off on a better note. My goal for this year was to not be at the same weight as I was at the end of last year. I know that in order to do that I have to focus more on tracking everything I eat, getting some exercise in at least 5-6 times a week and incorporate some treats every now and then so that I don’t feel deprived. My biggest problem is that I have the all or nothing mentality, so if I give in to a craving that I have, then I let that be an excuse to be off track all day or for several days and that leads me to a weight gain that makes me feel bad about myself. I need to learn that I can have some treats every once in a while but it doesn’t mean that I have to go crazy or anything. So I think that will be something I’m going to work on this next week, incorporating some treats throughout the week so that I don’t feel deprived and not allowing that to give me an excuse to eat whatever I want.
This week has been a great one for me because I have been focused and determined to stay on track and stay positive. On Instagram, I saw someone post about having a challenge to get 30 minutes of exercise every day for 7 days and I have been following that. There’s been a few days where I didn’t want to do it, but I pushed myself anyway to get it done and I’m glad that I did. I think sometimes it’s easy to tell myself that I’m too busy or I don’t want to do something, but I know that if I do it, I will feel better and it will help me get closer to my weight loss goal. So I am proud of myself for sticking to that this week and I plan to continue the challenge every week.
Also, my eating has been really good, I’ve gone over my points a few days but not by very much so I’m sure that won’t hurt anything. I’m confident that when I weigh in tomorrow that it will be a really good one. I am finally seeing the scale move in the right direction and I am happy about that.
My husband started harvesting yesterday so I guess it’s that time of year. It’s usually a pretty stressful time for me because he’s gone every day and it’s just me and the kids. But I’m going to try to make the best of it and focus on homeschooling, cleaning, and filming youtube videos. I’ve really loved filming videos and I want to get them uploaded more regularly.
So that’s the update for this week, I’m doing really well. I do miss WW meetings and wish that ours would start back up soon, but I have no idea if or when that will happen. I really looked forward to going every week and being around other people that are also on a weightloss journey. But for now, I’m just tracking my food and doing the best I can.